A Restless Heart

Roses like Peonies
Roses like Peonies

Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him. Psalm 37:3-7a NIV

 

When my Parkinson’s Disease started making itself known, one of its symptoms was RLS, otherwise known as Restless Leg Syndrome. RLS is a condition that can manifest itself in others who do not necessarily have Parkinson’s and yet, both groups find it, shall I say, quite annoying.

 

RLS makes your legs feel tingly and jumpy—restless—just like its name. You feel like your nerves are going to leap right out of your limbs (usually, but not always limited to, the legs) and can eventually find yourself walking in circles in the wee hours of the night (or morning!) to try to get it stopped.

 

Having this annoying condition has reminded me of Psalm 37, where David talks about being patient and trusting the Lord. When we grow restless and decide not to trust God, however unconsciously that choice may be, we tend to take matters into our own hands. We think we need to ‘fix’ the things in our lives that we feel are not working properly or are just plain – broken. We walk (or often run) around, trying to solve annoying issues, fix broken relationships, or whatever is ailing us.

 

David learned a much better way. He trusted God and in doing so, he found rest, which is obviously the opposite of restlessness. He rested by learning to dwell, to be settled and stay right where he was and enjoy God there. David was able to delight in the Lord and find pleasure in Him because his focus was vertical (his eyes were on God) and not horizontal (on his problems).

 

It took patience. He had to learn to be still and to wait. However, it didn’t come overnight. Remember his affair with Bathsheba and his attempt to fix what he had done? He spent many restless days trying to fix what went wrong in his life, only to make the situation worse with each attempt. While David’s situation was a sin issue, aren’t they all when it comes to not trusting God to deal with the issues in our lives?

 

I came face to face one day with God over the matter of trust. Trust is the opposite of doubt, mistrust, disbelief and skepticism. If I am not trusting, I am, instead, doubting that God can handle my situation. I am believing He isn’t going to come through for me. I am skeptical that He can or will do what He said he will do on my behalf. In essence, no matter how hard I may try to justify my thoughts or feelings or water down the truth, the truth is – I was calling God a liar. For me, that was sin as I felt I needed to take matters into my own hands. To think I need to fix what seems to be broken because somewhere inside of me, for some reason, I don’t believe that God will fix what I view as, my problem. To think that He isn’t going to fix it when I feel it needs fixing… now.

 

I’ve often ‘super-glued’ vases back together (if they weren’t shattered, as I’m not that talented!) right after I have broken it. It is often our tendency, for whatever reason (fear of discipline, forgetfulness to fix it later, etc.), to put aside what we were doing when the item was broken and to fix it right away. God, however, may not see the need to remedy our situations immediately. After all, when we try to put something back together quickly, it’s often in haste and doesn’t look so great. Again, we can look at David’s attempt to remedy his situation and see evidence of a job poorly done.

 

The answer to the super-glue attempt at life is trusting in a God who promises to give us the desires of our heart when we delight in Him. When God makes a promise, He will do it. He does not lie and can be trusted explicitly.

 

Are you restless about something? Are you struggling with trusting God to come through for you? Give over to Him now what ails you and claim His promises in Psalm 37. Wait patiently for Him to do it. The restlessness will cease and His fearpeace will come. Trust Him.