They tell you to stay away from milk –
it’s no good for you, you see –
even though you’re supposed to be upping
your intake of good-for-you vitamin D.
So – no more dipping Oreos.
no more ice cream or chocolate chip milkshakes
Only cereal that’s dry because you can’t have milk
on those Cheerios nor on those corn flakes.
And cereal, did you know, specifically Honeynut Cheerios
has four different types of sugar hiding inside its bag?
Yep – brown sugar, sugar, corn syrup, and caramel –
enough to send up several red flags.
Could the doctors be in this together?
Telling us what we can and what we cannot eat?
Why – they’re giving and getting reports of studies conducted
As to whether we should even meat.
Some say go ahead and indulge
Others say moderation and good choices are best.
While others will tell you to double up on kale,
Fresh broccoli, spinach and the rest.
So you try to choose something tasty,
Put it on your plate and pretend to enjoy chowing down.
Still, there’s only so much you can take,
as you partake of it while wearing a frown.
Simply named, I call it the ” PD Diet” –
guaranteed to help you maybe get a bit healthier .
While one doc says how great it will work,
Another cannot be one percent sure.
Dr. So and So says to leave the milk alone,
“It could cause pneumonia, down in your lungs, you see.”
And Dr. What’s His Name says cut out all bread
While Dr. Who’s It says regarding that bread,
“Go ahead and have two or three!”
Some doctors believe the consumption of protein
is okay if eaten at the right time of day –
not before a meal and not after as well
I say just forget it and have an avocado purée.
They’ll tell you to eat the dark chicken meat –
it’s easier to swallow as the stringy white kind.
Now, since I don’t care for dark, I guess I’ll skip both
and see if there might be something else I can find.
No added sugars in this PD diet as well
So I guess cookies are out of the question, too.
Cakes and pies are off the board
Anything pastry, flaky, and yummy just won’t do.
Beans, beans and more magical beans
Some more green stuff mixed in there too
Chew well, eat slowly, smaller bites will help
Lots of water will help wash down the goo.
This PD diet is just a tad bit facetious,
but tell me – what’s a body to do?
When I have one doctor tell me one thing
while another says differently,
It gets me craving a slice of cake or two!