Category Archives: Encouragement

A Rendition of Psalm 28

 

Photo by Sherri Woodbridge, 2015
 The Lord is our light, guiding us on this journey of life with… Parkinson’s disease. Or maybe for you, it’s cancer. MS. Crone’s disease. Depression. Or, maybe an addiction. A habit you want to break but can’t seem to do it.

The Lord is your light. What do you fear? The Lord is your stronghold in this life – what are you afraid of?

When thoughts of giving up or giving in – when they come upon you in an effort to eat away at your peace and confidence in Him and attack you from every side, seeking to break your spirit and render you useless – they will be thwarted and cast away.

Though an onslaught of useless, hopeless thoughts try to make a place for themselves in your life – thoughts like, “What if this happens?” or “What if that happens?” – even at moments like that… we can be confident. Content. Comforted.

We can approach Him with confidence. We can come with faith as small as a mustard seed, in search of the greatest desires of our hearts. We can approach Him without fear. We can seek Him for eternal blessings. We can look to Him for comfort in knowing that we will dwell with Him for all our days. In the days filled with moments of sorrow and moments filled with joy. And yes, even in the moments through our sicknesses and diseases – in all those moments consumed with fear – He can be found. We can find Him in His glory and majesty, waiting to extend His blessings of that comfort and safety. We can find him waiting to shelter us under his wings of strength. Willing – wanting – to be our refuge. To be the One we run to. The One we confide in. The One we cling to.

He will hold us up when we cannot sustain ourselves. He gives us strength when we are weak, compassion and understanding when we feel our bodies are failing, a spirit to fight when faced with fear, and joy for our journey. When we find this sweet spot – this place of rest – we are able and find delight in glorifying Him alone.

We cry out, “Hear me, God! Hear me! I am crying out to you! Have compassion on me. Show me kindness, gentleness, grace. Answer me. Please!” We run and chase after Him, desiring Him and Him alone. We fear He is hiding. That He really doesn’t care. Have we angered Him? Is He turning away from us as He turned from Christ in that dark moment upon the cross? Is this our cross to bear and must we bear it alone? Are these the fears that inhabit that utter darkness of despair?

Again, we cry out.

“Lord, God, Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit… do not play this game of hide and seek. Do not turn me away. Forgive me Lord, discipline me, rebuke me – but do not leave me!”

All is still.

All is quiet.

Did we dare to demand of Almighty God like that?!?

David did. God still loved and listened. Even called him FRIEND. David was honest to the core. And so we may be, too.

So quietly and softly we say it.

We feel it.

We express it.

After our cry, “Do not leave me!”, despairingly yet honestly we add, “Like so many before. …like I have You.”

We sit there. Emptied of the fight. Oddly, weak but renewed with His grace. Strengthened with His peace. Humbled with His faithfulness. Restored with His truth.

As it washes over us – a love that knows no conditions, a mercy that knows no bounds – we sit there and in a whisper we plead, “Teach me to be still Lord, to walk in faith and trust you in for every single step. May I not waver because of my fears.

“Do not let my them defeat me. They seek to destroy my peace, my state of mind, the truth that You still care. You’ve always cared.”

We take a deep breath. From somewhere within, we feel a renewed confidence in Him. A faith restored. Trust takes over, and fear falters.

“I am confident Lord, that I will see your goodness here on this earth, in the land of those who are living and so I will wait. In my confidence – in trust and with faith – I will wait

“Because of you, I will be strong and have hope. I will have an unquenchable courage that trusts in a loving God who fights for me. I will hope for the best, and anticipate the better. I will depend on you to dissipate the darkness in my days and to revive and renew me when the lot of despair threatens to depress me. And, as I wait, I will wait in wonder, watching for your hand to work in me – watching for You to work for me. “

For Those Who Hurt

An Interpretation of Psalm 28 for those who are hurting

MICHAEL J FOXYou have Parkinson’s disease. Or maybe it’s cancer. MS. Crone’s disease. Depression. Or, maybe an addiction. Perhaps a habit you want to break but can’t seem to do it. The Lord is your light, guiding you on this journey of life, whatever your struggle.

If the Lord is your light, what is it that you fear? If the Lord is the stronghold in your life, what is it that you afraid of?

When thoughts of giving up or giving in come upon you in an effort to eat away at our peace and confidence in Him, they will be thwarted. When we are attacked from every side and those thoughts seek to break our spirit and render us useless – they will be cast away.

Though an onslaught of useless, hopeless thoughts try to make a place for themselves in our life – thoughts like, “What if this happens?” or “What if that happens?” – even at moments like that… we can be confident. Content. Comforted.

We can approach Him with confidence, with faith as small as a mustard seed in search of the greatest desires of our hearts. We can approach Him without fear. We can seek Him for eternal blessings, comfort in knowing that we will dwell with Him for all our days, our nights and know that in the moments of our sorrows and our joys and yes, even in the moments through our sicknesses and diseases and all the fears that seem to be a part of the package- He can be found.  We can find Him in His glory and majesty, waiting to extend His blessings of comfort and safety. We can find Him waiting to shelter us under his wings of strength. Willing and wanting to be our refuge. The Refuge we eagerly run to. The One we confide in. The One we cling to.MAN - SAD

When we find comfort in Him, He holds us up when we cannot sustain ourselves. He gives us strength when we are weak. His strength. He gives us comfort when we feel our bodies are failing. His comfort. He gives us a spirit to fight when faced with fear. His spirit. And He gives us joy for our journey.  His joy. When we find this sweet spot, this place of rest, we are filled with an peace that surpasses understanding and we find delight in God.

There are times we cry out, “Hear me God! Hear me! I am crying out to you! Have compassion on me. Show me kindness, gentleness, grace. Answer me. Please!”

We run and chase after Him, desiring Him and Him alone. Is He hiding? Does He really care? Have we angered Him? Is He turning away from us as He turned from Christ in that dark moment upon the cross? Is this our cross to bear and must we bear it alone? Are these the fears that inhabit that utter darkness of despair?

Again, we cry out.

Lord, God, Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit… do not play this game of hide and seek. Do not turn me away. Forgive me Lord, discipline me, rebuke me – anything! But do not leave me!”

All is still.

Quiet.

Do we dare to demand of Almighty God like that?!

King David did. 

Yet, God still loved him and listened to his cries. Even called him friend. David was honest to the core.

We may be honest, as well. Not because David was but because God allows us to be.

So quietly and softly we say  it.

We feel it.

We express it.

After we cry out, “Do not leave me like so many others have done before,” and then convicted, we add, “Like I have done to You.”

We sit there. Emptied of the fight. Weak and yet renewed by His grace. Strengthened with His peace. Humbled because of His faithfulness. Restored with His truth

As it washes over us – a merciful love that knows no conditions, knows no bounds – we sit there and in a soft whisper we plead, “Teach me to be still Lord, to walk in faith and trust you in each step.  May I not waver because of my fears. Do not let them defeat me. They continually seek to destroy my peace, my state of mind, the truth that You still care.”

We take a deep breath. Faith is restored. Trust takes over and fears falter.

“I am confident Lord, that I will see your goodness here on this earth, in the land of those who are living and so… I will wait. In trust and with faith, I will wait.

“Because of You, I will be strong and have hope. I will have an unquenchable courage that trusts in a loving God who fights for me. I will hope for the best, and anticipate the better. I will depend on you to dissipate the darkness in my days and to revive and renew me when the lot of despair threatens to press me down. And, as I wait, I will wait in wonder, watching for Your hand to work in me, while You work for me. And as I wait, I will fall on my knees and You will lift me up.”

8 Things Caregivers Need

I remember not long ago a man confided in me that his wife had left him. He had Parkinson’s disease. Thirty years of marriage. Now, I’m not saying she left because he had PD, but whatever the reason(s), she left. You could say, just when he needed her most. 

It’s not uncommon at all for spouses to decide to leave when the other one gets sick (so much for “in sickness and in health”). I think it could be a matter of ‘having it up to here‘ and then finding out the one you’ve ‘put up with‘ for ever so long now has a condition that will not only made their life more difficult, but the caregiver’s life as well.

                             

Parkinson’s does that to a married couple. To a father-son relationship. To the bonds between mother and daughter. To friends. It comes in and subtlety takes away the ties which once bound these relationships together by a tight knot. What may have been a relationship tied together like loose shoe laces, is now dangling by a thread, if not completely torn apart already.

The PD patient changes. They are physically familiar, but mentally, emotionally – they’re not the same and the caregiver is left struggling with how to deal with their new lot in life – taking care of someone else while taking care of themselves.

If you are a caregiver to anyone, first of all, thank you for your commttment and sacrifice. You might get hit, have to change yet another big girl or boy diaper, clean up another spill, wash another naked body, but we – your charges – appreciate you more than we might be able to say or show..

And now, here are eight little things you can do as a caregiver to, hopefully, make your role a little bit easier….

  • Breathe deeply and when you get one free minute (or two), please do one thing  (or two) that puts a smile on your face. Go out to the garden and breathe in the fragrance of a rose. Put on encouraging music. Read a short devotional. Fix a cup of tea.  And then scream.
  • Don’t focus on the what-ifs. They’ll defeat you most every time. Do focus on now. Things may seem like a tremendous struggle at the moment, but you have to admit that things really could be worse. Today is just one of the harder days, but when the clock strikes twelve, it’s a new day and something wonderful could be ahead that may just make it easier (the patent may turn into a pumpkin!). Don’t lose hope.
  • If you don’t have one already (and most likely what you’re going through is causing you to find one), get a sense of humor. Without one, you’ll often despair. Find something funny in every day. If there really isn’t anything you can find, read or watch something funny. You need to laugh.

                                                      

  • Get yourself into a support group locally or online. You may not think you need it yet (or ever), but you do. Especially as the road becomes bumpier. And it will get bumpier. Get some support in place now, as it will make things easier to deal with later.
  • You need your friends. Don’t alienate them by thinking “you’ve got this“. Accept their invitation of help. Accept their giving you an hour off, washing the dishes, picking up some groceries, dropping the kids off at practice, cooking your family a meal. Give yourself some slack and let your friends feel needed, because if they are offering to help before you have even asked, they may be able to see your need better than you do.
  • Try to think ahead. Your loved one’s mental faculties may not be so great anymore. A daily schedule may be useful with a reminder for doctor appointments, visitors, special occasions, etc. They have white boards that have permanent monthly calendars that you can easily change for each different month and activities. This reduces stress in many ways  – for everyone.

                                                      

  • Don’t beat yourself up. There will be good days and bad days. That’s what life is made of, only now your good days and bad days have had a debilitating disease thrown into the mix. You may have more ‘bad’ days now due to your new, unwanted role. And because this is admittedly, an unwanted role, you hate it. You loathe it. You feel like your life has been stolen along with the one you’re caring for. You have thoughts of packing it in. Giving  up. Throwing in the towel. Leaving the patient to fend for him/herself and walking away. You’re tired, weary, spent, worn out. You want it to end and you feel guilty for thinking and feeling the way you do.  And it’s okay. It’s normal. Your caring for the one you’re grieving over while you’re grieving over what you’ve both lost already and could very well lose still. It’s okay to be frustrated, to go outside for a reprieve and scream. It’s okay to let the tears flow. Just remember: the one you love is in this fight with you, not against you. They are just not able to fight as they once did. Try to remember them as who they were 10, 15, 20 years ago when you laughed together and went for walks together and… you know, those things.
  • Try to remember… if your loved one could get out and mow the lawn again, he’d do it in a heartbeat – if he could. If the wife you care for could brush her own teeth and tie her own shoes, you’d both be ecstatic that you weren’t needed for that anymore. Whatever you’re losing, they are losing as well and have been internally dreading these days coming with a vengeance. If they could, they’d take this bitter cup from you faster than you think.  And remember, the cup will be dry one day, so enjoy it now while there is still some juice left – even if at times it may be sour. 

We don’t mean to be a pain. Trust me. I know.

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