Lessons from A Fall

Copyright 2012 by Sherri Woodbridge
Copyright 2012 by Sherri Woodbridge

today.

hot.

chances of no rain.

no breeze.

just hot.

but a beautiful day.

 

so i decided to wash down the house.

rid the structure of black widows that seemed to be crawling into every crack.

every crevice.

every hole.

every opening.

everywhere.

 

did i mention i hate underwire bras?

yes.

that’s important to know.

i only have one.

because it’s still decent

too decent to not feel guilty of discarding.

and today, i was wearing just that one.

that’s important to know.

 

i sprayed the sides of the structure.

the windows.

the overhangs.

 

i killed one.

two.

three.

four.

five black widows as big as my pinky.

 

i felt like the exterminator in Aracnophobia

and watched them sizzle against the wood

in the 105 degree sun

while spraying them with poison.

 

it was spine chilling.

but i did it.

 

and then it was time to move hose,

from the back.

to the front.

 

as i stood up

after bending over to unhook the hose

from the faucet,

it happened.

 

i fell.

i took three steps forward –

and i fell.

 

and i was reminded of the little teapot

who was short and stout

who was tipped out and poured out

and i felt just like her –

short and stout,

tipped and toppled over

and poured out all over the cement driveway.

 

and the broom stick i was holding,

instead of bracing me and giving me support,

toppled with me

and jabbed into my left breast

and the only thing one can think of

when confronted in such a situation is

“did anyone see me?”

 

with pride intact,

i slowly stood

surprising myself

with the lack of tears

and carried on

with the task at hand.

 

and as i began to spray again

i rubbed the sore spot,

quite certain

i at least badly bruised,

if not cracked, the rib

in the spot aforementioned.

 

as i rubbed it,

i noticed the wire in my brazier

was badly bent

where the broomstick handle had hit.

 

i changed from my pest control uniform

into my S.W.A.T. team member uniform,

for at that moment i felt like one

who had been shot

and saved by the bullet proof vest –

(in my case the brazier)

i had been wearing.

 

instead of hating that underwire bra

i suddenly was oh so thankful for it –

after all, it saved my life

(at least my breast).

 

so how does this have anything to do with Parkinson’s disease?

 

ladies, it may be safer to wear underwire bras.

at least if your carrying a broom stick

while hunting for black widows.

 

it’s been tested.

and they work.

i have the ‘v’ shaped wire to prove it.

A Rendition of Psalm 28

 

Photo by Sherri Woodbridge, 2015
 The Lord is our light, guiding us on this journey of life with… Parkinson’s disease. Or maybe for you, it’s cancer. MS. Crone’s disease. Depression. Or, maybe an addiction. A habit you want to break but can’t seem to do it.

The Lord is your light. What do you fear? The Lord is your stronghold in this life – what are you afraid of?

When thoughts of giving up or giving in – when they come upon you in an effort to eat away at your peace and confidence in Him and attack you from every side, seeking to break your spirit and render you useless – they will be thwarted and cast away.

Though an onslaught of useless, hopeless thoughts try to make a place for themselves in your life – thoughts like, “What if this happens?” or “What if that happens?” – even at moments like that… we can be confident. Content. Comforted.

We can approach Him with confidence. We can come with faith as small as a mustard seed, in search of the greatest desires of our hearts. We can approach Him without fear. We can seek Him for eternal blessings. We can look to Him for comfort in knowing that we will dwell with Him for all our days. In the days filled with moments of sorrow and moments filled with joy. And yes, even in the moments through our sicknesses and diseases – in all those moments consumed with fear – He can be found. We can find Him in His glory and majesty, waiting to extend His blessings of that comfort and safety. We can find him waiting to shelter us under his wings of strength. Willing – wanting – to be our refuge. To be the One we run to. The One we confide in. The One we cling to.

He will hold us up when we cannot sustain ourselves. He gives us strength when we are weak, compassion and understanding when we feel our bodies are failing, a spirit to fight when faced with fear, and joy for our journey. When we find this sweet spot – this place of rest – we are able and find delight in glorifying Him alone.

We cry out, “Hear me, God! Hear me! I am crying out to you! Have compassion on me. Show me kindness, gentleness, grace. Answer me. Please!” We run and chase after Him, desiring Him and Him alone. We fear He is hiding. That He really doesn’t care. Have we angered Him? Is He turning away from us as He turned from Christ in that dark moment upon the cross? Is this our cross to bear and must we bear it alone? Are these the fears that inhabit that utter darkness of despair?

Again, we cry out.

“Lord, God, Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit… do not play this game of hide and seek. Do not turn me away. Forgive me Lord, discipline me, rebuke me – but do not leave me!”

All is still.

All is quiet.

Did we dare to demand of Almighty God like that?!?

David did. God still loved and listened. Even called him FRIEND. David was honest to the core. And so we may be, too.

So quietly and softly we say it.

We feel it.

We express it.

After our cry, “Do not leave me!”, despairingly yet honestly we add, “Like so many before. …like I have You.”

We sit there. Emptied of the fight. Oddly, weak but renewed with His grace. Strengthened with His peace. Humbled with His faithfulness. Restored with His truth.

As it washes over us – a love that knows no conditions, a mercy that knows no bounds – we sit there and in a whisper we plead, “Teach me to be still Lord, to walk in faith and trust you in for every single step. May I not waver because of my fears.

“Do not let my them defeat me. They seek to destroy my peace, my state of mind, the truth that You still care. You’ve always cared.”

We take a deep breath. From somewhere within, we feel a renewed confidence in Him. A faith restored. Trust takes over, and fear falters.

“I am confident Lord, that I will see your goodness here on this earth, in the land of those who are living and so I will wait. In my confidence – in trust and with faith – I will wait

“Because of you, I will be strong and have hope. I will have an unquenchable courage that trusts in a loving God who fights for me. I will hope for the best, and anticipate the better. I will depend on you to dissipate the darkness in my days and to revive and renew me when the lot of despair threatens to depress me. And, as I wait, I will wait in wonder, watching for your hand to work in me – watching for You to work for me. “

Keeping What I’ve Got

  Dear Doctor, I’ve come here today

To get a new body, give my old one away

My feet – they stumble

They trip and I fall

And my brain’s becoming sluggish – but that’s not all.

 

My fingers won’t move the way I move them

My arms and legs they shake

You’d think I’d learn

There are no returns

On the parts of our bodies that break.

 

It’s not getting any easier

Other things are going wrong as I speak

Do you think you could do something, 

Somehow, anything

Your expertise is what I now seek.

 

I’ve put in for a new toe or two

The ones I have are not working well

They hurt, they bend

It’s becoming a trend

And hasn’t been too terribly swell.

 

Yet, doctor, you know – I’ve been thinking

About keeping at least my two eyes

They’ve helped me to see 

Incredible things

Like rainbows, the sunset  and  sunrise.

 

And you know – about my hands,

They’ve made so many things

And I’ll keep my voice

(I don’t have a choice),

My grandkids like when their Grammy sings.

 

And then, there are my legs,

They really have been good to me

They carried me here,

They’ve walked me to there

They’ve supported me constantly.

 

And let me not forget my heart

That has beat within every day 

I’ll keep that too

(it’s the least I can do),

For it’s guided me when along life’s way.

.

 

So I guess I’ve changed my mind

And I’ll keep all that God’s given me

I’ll enjoy what I’ve got,

‘Cuz I’ve got quite a lot,

I’m alive, been forgiven, and set free.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

via National Parkinson Foundation: Short and Long-Term Problems with Anticholinergic Drugs used for Sleep, Bladder, and Tremor Symptoms in Parkinson’s Disease Patients

You can find out more about NPF’s National Medical Director, Dr. Michael S. Okun, by also visiting the NPF Center of Excellence, University of Florida Health Center for Movement Disorders and Neurorestoration. Dr. Okun is also the author of the Amazon #1 Parkinson’s Best Seller 10 Secrets to a Happier Life.
  Parkinson’s disease patients frequently struggle to identify drug therapies that can address bothersome symptoms such as sleep dysfunction, bladder urgency, drooling, and tremor. Many of the drug therapies such as Benadryl (diphenhydramine), Advil PM, Alleve PM, common antihistamines, and others pills are readily available over the counter and do not require a prescription. These medications block a cholinergic receptor in the brain, and can improve many Parkinson’s disease symptoms. However, the price of taking these drugs may be steep (thinking problems, confusion, unsteadiness and even falling). An older French study of hospitalized Parkinson’s disease patients revealed that though 46% of all demented patients were confused, 93% on anticholinergic therapy had delirium and confusion when in the hospital (Agid et. al.). Deficiencies of the chemical acetylcholine have been reported to underpin thinking issues and shortages of the chemical have been observed in the brainstem, hippocampus, and cortex of Parkinson’s disease patients. Though anticholinergic use can result in drowsiness, dry mouth, urinary retention, memory problems as well as constipation, many patients find these therapies useful. In this month’s What’s Hot column we will address the short and long-term potential side effects of using of anti-cholinergic medications in Parkinson’s disease.
Cooper and colleagues in 1992 addressed thinking ability in a group of 82 freshly diagnosed and untreated Parkinson’s disease patients. The patients in this study were all randomized to receive levodopa (Sinemet), bromocriptine (a dopamine agonist) or an anticholinergic drug. Though all three treatments improved motor performance, the anticholinergic drugs produced memory impairments. Many subsequent studies including the National Parkinson Foundation QII prospective study have confirmed these findings.
Perry and colleagues in 2003 investigated the idea that blocking brain acetylcholine receptors could lead to more “Alzheimer’s changes” in the Parkinson’s disease brain. Interestingly, the researchers reported that an important marker of Alzheimer’s disease, the amyloid plaque density, was present in more than double the concentration in Parkinson’s disease patients treated with long-term anticholinergic therapy. Another marker of Alzheimer’s disease, the neurofibrillary tangle, was also more prominent in the brains of those taking anticholinergic drugs. 
The most recent worrisome evidence surrounding anticholinergic therapy is drawn from an article in a recent issue of JAMA Internal Medicine written by pharmacist Shelly Gray. The authors utilized data from the Adult Changes in Thought Study. The investigation was based in Washington state and had an impressive 3434 people enrolled who were 65 years or older. All study participants were screened at inclusion to be sure there was no evidence for dementia. The authors cleverly used computerized pharmacy data to assess each participant’s exposure to anticholinergic drugs. The most common anticholinergic drugs were old-fashioned tricyclic antidepressants (TCA’s), antihistamines, and also drugs used for bladder and sleep. The patients were followed for 7 years and the data revealed that over 20% were shown to develop dementia. Participants who took anticholinergic drugs for three years or more had a greater than 50% higher dementia risk. Also, a higher cumulative dose of anticholinergic drugs increased the risk for dementia when compared to those taking anticholinergic drugs for 90 days or less. 
The bottom line for Parkinson’s disease patients is that there should be a greater awareness of the short and the long-term potential side effects of anticholinergic therapy. Short-term, Parkinson’s disease patients should be aware that anticholinergics may precipitate drowsiness, dry mouth, urinary retention, memory problems, blurry vision, and constipation as well as a host of other side effects. Long-term, there is an increased risk of dementia. It is important for Parkinson’s disease patients to routinely review medication lists with both a doctor and a pharmacist and to try to identify other medication alternatives. 
Some practical suggestions include:

Identify alternative antidepressants with less anticholinergic effects

Watch out for over the counter drugs like Benadryl (diphenhydramine) and antihistamines

Dopamine agonists, levodopa, and deep brain stimulation can all potentially be used for difficult to control tremor instead of anticholinergics

Botulinuma toxin injections can be employed for drooling and for some cases of bladder dysfunction

Sometimes atropine drops under the tongue or chewing gum can be employed for drooling issues

A type of physical therapy referred to as pelvic floor rehabilitation can be helpful for bladder retraining in those with urinary frequency

If hospitalized be sure the doctors do not use anticholinergics for sleep or bladder dysfunction

Parkinson’s disease patients and their interdisciplinary care teams can usually work together to reduce or to eliminate anticholinergic drug use.

10 Signs You MIGHT Have Parkinson’s Disease

imageYou look like you have PD. You act like you have PD. You talk like you have PD. You feel like you have PD. You sound like you have PD. You smell like you have PD (It’s true!).

Point: All of the above may seem true, but it won’t necessarily mean you have Parkinson’s disease. Because this disease can mimic so many other neurological diseases, including Lyme disease, Multiple Sclerosis, and Lupus (to name just a few), it is extremely important to get an accurate diagnosis, and that could take years and several opinions of highly qualified doctors.

However, there are markers that are quite prevalent to Parkinson’s disease that should send you seeking a definitive diagnosis, no matter how long it takes.

Here are ten signs that you might have Parkinson’s disease, which exclude the biggie – tremors (because everyone usually associates that one with PD automatically).

  1. Loss of smell.  You notice flowers no longer have a fragrance. Ben-Gay doesn’t knock you out. You can’t smell dinner. If your nose isn’t constantly plugged up, it could be a sign of Parkinson’s disease.
  2. Loss of facial expression.  imagePeople ask why you look so sad. People ask why you look so unhappy. Although Parkinson’s disease can alter our moods and cause mild to severe depression, what they are seeing is the affects that PD has on facial muscles. Doesn’t that make you oh, so happy?
  3. Gait.  You trip often. Perhaps even fall. You notice one of your feet won’t keep up with the other and drags somewhat. You may have a shuffling effect like that of a penguin when you walk. No, you are not part bird. You might have PD.
  4. Soft voice.  People tell you to speak up. People are always saying “What?” when you speak, as if they aren’t even listening. They tell you to not speak so softly. You may not be able to help it if it’s Parkinson’s.
  5. Dystonia.  Do your toes tend to curl under in pain? Your muscles seize up and hurt like the dickens? You might be able to blame the disease.
  6. Handwriting.  Did you once get praised for your handwriting? How lovely, legible and readable it was and now it’s barely more than scribble? Could be…
  7. Stiffness/Rigidity.  Is your neck often stiff? An ache in the shoulders/neck area/back? Hmmm…
  8. Balance.  Some people have actually been stopped by authorities who have thought they are dealing with someone who is intoxicated because of the way they are walking. Nope. Just Parkinson’s, but it might make you want to drink.
  9. Non-Swinging Arm.  Someone asks you why only one of your arms swings while you walk. MICHAEL J FOXSomeone asked Michael J. Fox that same question while he was jogging. His wife. That sent him to the doctor, which for him, was the beginning of a new journey…
  10. Doctor’s opinion.  
    Dr. Santiago, Boo's Black Doggy, and me after  first programming of DBS stimulator.
    Dr. Santiago (a great MDS), Boo’s Black Doggy, and me after my first programming of DBS stimulator. Muhammad Ali Parkinson’s Center, Pheonix, Arizona.
    What?!? Yes, a doctor’s opinion may be a sign you have PD and I say MIGHT because doctors are not gods and they make mistakes and get it wrong. With Parkinson’s disease, it is not uncommon to be misdiagnosed the first, second, even third go around. As said earlier, it mimics so many other diseases that it can be difficult for some neurologists to diagnose accurately, which is why a doctor’s opinion MIGHT be a sign that you have PD and, in the same respect, that you DON’T have PD.

If you are concerned you may have PD because you’re showing any of the signs above, the best point of action is to make an appointment with a good neurologist – one that has experience with Parkinson’s disease or, better yet, a Movement Disorder Specialist (a neurologist who specializes in movement disorders specifically). And if you don’t like the first diagnosis, get another one. If they differ, get another one. Don’t stop until you are satisfied that you have the correct diagnosis and peace of mind over what you are dealing with. It might not be the greatest news you’ve ever gotten, but at least you’ll know what you’re up against and what you’ll need for your new journey.

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